Second guessing for a second time.

It occurs to me, that maybe I just shouldn't say anything. Not necessarily become a mute, but anything regarding what I plan to do. The other day, I posted that after The Talon Strand, my writing would become almost non-existent. Which, honestly was a hard thing to say. Anyway, we automatically assume that our brain will do the rest and move on... acceptance and all that jazz.

No! Not my brain! Not a fucking chance. Ever since I made that stupid bloody post, my brain has taken it upon its self to pound me into submission with ideas about my books and not a single idea has been about the two books I have planned to finish, those being The Talon Strand and Beating hearts. Speaking of which, Beating hearts is looking really good. I'll have to tell you a bit about it soon but it's great working with Jolie.

Even yesterday, after work I went to my Nan's as I usually do on a Tuesday evening. Except the bugger wasn't in, just a note explaining she'd gone gallivanting off to bingo somewhere. So then I decided to make some tea, a large quantity of tuna and pasta, it's the simple things. But much to my chagrin, Nan had either hidden/chucked away the dodgy tin opener. I soon gave up on cooking and decided on a burger and chips from the take-away... Anyway, to my point! On the way there, I was actually debating with myself on ways I could improve one of my stories (Indigo Watch) out loud in the middle of the street. Luckily I had the cover of darkness.

I am a strong believer in fate but only to the degree that fate is mainly a chance occurrence made so by our choices. I do not believe it is fate for me to write. Perhaps, deep down buried in my genetic material, there is a collective need to express myself through words but that isn't fate. So now, rather than make decisions that my brain obviously doesn't agree with, I will just see how things go and move on... acceptance and all that jazz - Though upon comprehending that I've accepted it's premises, I wouldn't be surprised if my brain changed its mind and not a single idea popped up.

Anyway, before I swing off to the gym and lose my mind (or at least appear so), I will be attempting poetry later, if my brain will let me.