Oh, Saturdays...

So I finished work yesterday and headed home swiftly ready for some breakfast and a couple of episodes of Bones. My cousin text me if we were still on for the gym which I confirmed we were. We haven't been since before Three peaks and I've been dying to get back, despite my knee.

Anyway we came, we saw, we conquered and it was good to be back. We enjoyed a protein shake, followed by a salad and then he told me he fancied a few beers. Luckily we left it to late so we couldn't go otherwise I would of been regretting it today.

Over the weekend, the first to acts of Maybe, misery have been removed from Amazon with the only remaining copies being from third party sellers. Act Two has gone and the last time I checked Act One had only a single copy remaining. This makes the owners of the paperbacks sold, holders of a limited edition. Which made me smile a bit, but it was the right thing to do. They will not reflect the quality of the full book but I have learned a lot releasing the first two acts.

I can look forward to the fact, that in less than 4 weeks Maybe, misery will be heading to a professional editor and it will come back better than ever. I've have spent the past week tweaking it in different ways and I will do so until it leaves my grasp. I know it's not perfect... However it is my baby and I love it. I'm also excited because I know for a fact that if I wanted to, it could continue into another book. Not necessarily following the same character but set within the same world and I've grown to love the fictional world I've spent so long inside.

I'm back working nights as well tonight and since I was woken up at ten a.m, today is going to be a long day. I've have spent the day watching more Bones and tweaking Maybe, misery and I can't wait until June 27th when it all kicks off in preparation for it's release.

Happy Saturday everybody.

C.S

A day's daze.

I love Wednesdays! It's my Saturday. It was especially awesome because I only returned to work from my holiday on Tuesday. I awoke with expectations of hitting the gym, only to find my knee wasn't in any position to do so, let me tell you it's fucking annoying! I set off walking but when the pain became too much, I limped home weakened by my weakness.

So I decided, to have some breakfast and watch Wonders of the universe. Brian Cox is awesome, that is all. Afterwards I figured I should do some work on Maybe, misery and began fidgeting with the cover in between reading it for the 50th time. It's coming along nicely and is slowly transforming into the story I want to tell. I still can't believe it's taken three years! It's plain crazy. The ever delightful Eilis offered to come round and make up for my indecisiveness by helping me pick a cover.

I'd previously shared a few choices on here, via KUF and on the ever UNsociable Facebook with every person liking a different design much to my chagrin. We worked on it for a while and she even helped write my blurb again. Every time I mention my book she comes around with a shiny object... I think it's a knife. Luckily she just about put up with me long enough to create a cover I actually liked, minus any tiny details... I felt like starting a conga, despite my tired facial expression.

Luckily today was a good day and quite a few people helped me out so thanks for that if it was you! So I've got my cover completely finished... and a special mention goes out to the KUF member who told me it was spot on... the guy made my day. All I have to do now is wait PATIENTLY until late June when it gets shipped off for a line edit. It's worth mentioning that writers don't get enough credit, especially self published ones. Though I don't consider myself one until the full book comes out, it's been a hell of a lot of work and I can't see it getting any less time consuming. So the next time you buy a book, remember some guy or woman probably broke their back getting it to you.

There's been a lot of talk about politics recently and it's all just made me roll my eyes. Oh, by the way Mr. Government man, if you think I'm going to vote, you may as well get down on your knee's now and I will not be paying a fine. Don't get me wrong, I'm not ignorant to a countries needs; especially one in such dire condition. I just want to see more logic, I mean if we executed every person that touched a child or committed murder, we'd save a lot of money on Xbox's and providing them with meals each day. It's a simple as this, if you touch a child, you don't deserve to eat. The problem is, is that this country has gone soft, led my our limp spineless Government officials. Already they're cutting the budget to law enforcement. Apparently if your car gets stolen where I live, the police aren't guaranteed to come to your aid! So basically crime will go up with our troglodyte chav infestation knowing they can get away with it. Do you know what the problem is with this scenario? BATMAN is a fictional character! There is no meaning to our lives, it's simply a gift of time and a gift some people don't deserve. So grow a spine, cut their gift short and you'll have my vote.

I'm sorry if people find my views extreme... there's too many people jumping on that train to devolution land.

I don't know where that came from :p It must be time for more Wonders of the universe. Have a nice evening everybody :) I almost forgot, my memory is shit. Check out this blog http://thecultofme.blogspot.co.uk/ The guys awesome and his page great for readers and writers alike :)

Dilemmas, dilemmas.

So anyway... Now I'm back to reality after my short break, I'm back working on Maybe, misery making any last minute changes before it goes to the line editor at the end of June. I've got to admit, it's good to be back with my first love. Before my break and as I were building up to the release of act three, I felt I'd had enough and I just wanted it to be out and out of the way. Now though, I have realized why I fell in love with telling this story and I can't wait until it's out there in it's full glory. Anyway... I won't bore you with any of my daily actives today; what I will do is ask for your help. I can't decide for the life of me which cover to use so I'm hoping some outside perspective will help! Anyway, I hope you don't mind sparing a second to share you thoughts. You can just comment on this blog, or FB me: https://www.facebook.com/csbailey or even contact me on KUF: http://www.kuforum.co.uk/kindleusersforum/user-14428.html And through my website: http://maybemisery.co.uk/

Thank you for your time, C.S

The cover I used for act one, but this was originally meant as the full book cover. 

I love the blue colour but I'm not sure if it reflects the tone of the book.

This one is most peoples choice and was mine until uncertainty struck.

This would probably be my last choice.

Considering my book was originally title The Document, this cover is fitting, but a bit bland perhaps.

I quite like this cover, especially with a white back cover.

Dutch Courage.

So I'm back from my escape to Amsterdam, my freedom from social net-working and a rest from life in general. I won't lie and say it's good to be back home because it isn't. As our plane descended into the John Lennon airport, I became overwhelmed with this feeling of dread, of despair... I really didn't want to come home.

Amsterdam is an amazingly beautiful place, only tarnished by weekend visitors; mainly males from the country I call my own looking for a quick peek at the girls of the red light district and to make as much noise as possible.
We arrived on Thursday morning and as soon as we stepped outside past the ball ache that is airport security the sun hit us like a battering ram of joy.
Immediately, we were lost and it felt fantastic, I have a small obsession with being lost so it was definitely welcome! We found help and made it to our hotel but check in wasn't until 2 pm so we went for an English breakfast. Having our backpacks strapped to us, we were looking much like typical tourists, especially with the giant map we were constantly gazing at.

We soon found ourselves at a local cafe, enjoying a nice cold pint of cider and a smoke. We sat there for hours and it was brilliant, no stress just peace. As the day went on, we continued to drink and then eat and then drink some more until the night when we met some Norwegian housewives. There was one who was unmarried, Silja, a delightful older woman who was smart, well read (of course I told her about Maybe, misery) and yearning to go to a sex show. As the drinks flowed, we ended up walking around the red light district with Silja and her friends gazing at the working girls begging for our attention and they were worthy. Silja almost stopping at every window to tell them how beautiful they were and she was right to. The working girls in Amsterdam are not the drug addled old wombats of England, they are young, beautiful students just trying to make a living. We eventually went to a peep show and... it was strange. As we three enjoyed a cold chocolate and a smoke, we found it was like 2 in the morning so we took the very drunk Silja home and headed back to our hotel to pass out after an extremely long day.

I slept like a baby, the next day, I can't quite re-call what we did... I know we drank, ate lots and smoked and then walked everywhere with the pains in my knee coming back again. It was a lot busier on the Friday though and nowhere near as peaceful. We did make it to the museum of prostitution though.

Saturday was our last full day so we had to get shit seen, we hit the Van Gough museum were I got a very cool t-shirt. Then we got lost walking across the city to a canal cruise, which was relaxing especially for our feet. We made it back to the hotel, had a rest and then headed out for one last night of drinking. We met a Norwegian woman and a French woman who told us about the bad reputation the British have, I was hardly surprised considering how much noise the primitive British male makes. Then there was a power outage which we found out was to commemorate someone.

  Anyway, this blog is becoming lengthy so Ill stick to bullet points:

• Beer and food is expensive
• Weed isn't
• The working girls are mostly stunning but 50 euros for 6 minutes is crazy
• My cousin was texting too much
• I nagged at him about it too much
• Don't go if your still nursing a knee injury
• If you want to experience everything, go for longer than 4 days
• Be careful walking as it's chaos
• Don't go at the weekend, it's crazy busy with tourists
• Take a lot more money than you think you'll need

I think that's about it... I've probably missed loads out. It really is a stunning place and I could easily see myself living there. I didn't want to come home but here I am regardless, on the plus side... it's now time to get Maybe, misery ready for it's line edit and eventual release. After that, maybe I'll look at taking a trip back to glorious Amsterdam.

That DAM Blog/ Terrestrial Destination

So anyway my good friend Eilis apparently reckons all I blog about is either work, my Nan, the gym, eating and sleeping... then claimed she wanted a mention. So here you go Eilis, quit your whining :p So I wont tell you about any of that today. What I will tell you all is that, in the early hours of Thursday morning I will be jetting off to Amsterdam for four days as a reward for completing Three Peaks so there will be no talk of what I said I wouldn't talk about in this blog for at least four days. As a parting gift or burden, depending on your opinion, I'll leave you with a bit more writing following on from Red Flash. Remember it's only a first draft, nothing more, nothing less. So enjoy and I'll see you all soon :)

C.S

 Terrestrial Destination

As we walk along the elevated walk way, slowly approaching the Catalyst, I look down at my suspension guards confining me from any form of escape, these tiny little oval shaped objects are stabbed into our arms and as they flash red, they send currents through our bodies disrupting our gifts.

We are escorted by Drataan’s supreme guard, faceless clones, bound in armour and implanted with a fraction of their masters powers. If I was not retrained, I would slaughter them all for what they have done, all the families they have killed… Drataan’s number one, Caleb, effectively ended the war destroying our life-labs, containing over twenty thousand unborn beings. They were our re-enforcements.

At twenty three, I am still considered a child, one of the lucky few who have grown naturally; if you’d class growing up through war, witnessing every blood covered year lucky. We can live up to the age of one thousand years and at the age of nine hundred, you are elevated to ancestor status.   

My eyes cast around from our glistening blue oceans towards the gigantic marble statues of our elders. To my right stands Lucian, Annai’s father. Standing tall, Lucian was a great man and all knowing. I look over at Annai, she is staring at the stone floor, her brown fringe covering her eye’s from my gaze but I can see the sadness in the way she walks.

As we walk past her, fathers statue, she looks in my direction and in a poor attempt to comfort her from afar, I convey what I believe to be a supportive smile. Annai, returns my gesture and as looking longingly into her eyes, I feel the pain she does; which is most probably due to her gift on transference.

As Drataan held her by the throat, she could of easily made him feel like it was him who was choking to death, but she did not. Annai either wanted to die, or Drataan was immune. I don’t have the nerve to ask her what happened and I doubt I ever will, Annai is my closest friend and I don’t want to ever push her away from my protection.

As we approach the Catalyst’s main chamber, the giant arched doors decorated with the story of our beginning creak open slowly and we are ushered through, thanks to a prod in the back from ours guards staff.

We ten stand together waiting for the judge to arrive and deliver us to our fateful punishment. I look over at Karl, who’s is probably my best friend. His short brown hair in patches due to wounds from a staff weapon. His clothes are war torn like the rest of us, asides from Annai, he’s the only one I actually recognise in our small crowd. He’s about my height, has small oval brown eyes, a pointy nose and the gift of pyrokinesis, he can create fire and manipulate it however he sees fit.

Karl looks over at me with a look of concern, he senses the end is near and I convey a look of mutual agreement back towards him. His eyes cast towards the ground and an overwhelming feeling of sadness floods my entire body. I have failed… We have failed, our fathers would not be proud. I was bread to never give up, to fight until the end but as I witnessed Annai in the evil clutches of Drataan, I could not stand to lose her.

I shuffle over towards Annai but the guard immediately notices me and pounds the back of my legs with his staff. I look around at his blank face and scowl. I pull myself up and make my way next to Annai, staring at the guard for times entirety. Annai looks up at me with sadness, her big hazel eyes are beautiful and they remind me of the moons of Quellis, a far away planet that used to be a prime location for romantic getaways, it was Drataan’s first target and it, like most of the other worlds he attacked, is now dead. If you look into the sky by night, you can clearly see the embers still raging rapidly. It had been a constant reminder for many years that the war was never over.

‘Annai… I am sorry I failed.’

‘You didn’t fail Osias, we all did.’

Almost immediately, a door to the right slides open and a judge shuffles through. It’s judge Tyrainius, a friend of my fathers. His battered old body makes his way slowly towards the front and centre escorted by two guards. His ageing face looks upon us and he notices I’m part of this group.

The guard to his left places a scroll in his hands for him to read from. Tyrainius constantly swallows his words as he reads from the scroll of our fate… ‘Traitors against the cause of our master Drataan, you have been judged and sentenced to the following punishment… Exile, through the great Catalyst. You are being made to suffer for your sins… And if you ever return; you will be killed instantly.’

He looks upon us all one last time ‘may the Gods be with you, for you are the paragons… the best of us.’ As the guards close in around him, the judge turns the cogs on the Catalyst and it starts to tick like a clock. This magnificent devise is as tall as the chamber that confines it, coated black, it transports matter to anywhere in the known universe, including the Unknown. I can only hope we don’t end up there. The three orb like chambers, start to descend on each other until they are one. The door of the largest chamber starts to open and in it we step, one by one. 

The Three Peaks.

There are so many challenges in life, money troubles, relationships and striving to better yourself; The latter of which some people don't even bother with. Many are just happy to exist without living, which includes myself for many years, a slave to routinely surviving.

it was only when writing Maybe, misery that my life changed. I began to crave more... Not more money or more success but more from life in general. My cousin and I found ourselves wanting to do things that not everyone could do, an almost elitist attitude to improving ourselves. First up came Tough Mudder, the 12 mile assault course designed by the military.
Out of shape and out of mind, we spent the better part of a year training, preparing for what lie ahead. Myself, the human procrastinator going through phases of training and then putting it off much to the understandable annoyance of my cousin.

Luckily for me, we sorted our shit out and became a stronger team of two, though we're still shit at Call Of Duty. The time flew by and it was soon time for our first challenge. It's safe to say our determination led the way and we destroyed that course in style.
Afterwards we felt proud and it's safe to say I felt slightly egotistic because along the way we witness people fitter than ourselves breaking down, giving up and yet we persevered. What was next we eventually found ourselves asking?

My cousin had heard of The Three Peak challenge and suggested it to me, being plucky and over confident I thought it was a great idea. We trained for half a year building up our strength and even booked ourselves a holiday as a reward upon completion.

Friday soon came and it's safe to say now, we had no idea what we were in for. We had a long drive up to Oban in Scotland and got booked into our hotel. Scotland is gorgeous, filled with independent businesses only ruined by the shitty weather. After fish, chips and mushy peas with my cousin and his girlfriend who was selflessly driving us around, I settled into my lonely room and actually got some writing done.

We were due to wake at 4 a.m, I woke at 12.45 a.m so I showered and sat around anxiously waiting. My cousin informed me he had a shitty nights sleep. It soon became time to set off to Ben Nevis thinking we were ready.

Arriving at 5.20 a.m we were due to set off at 6, but we set off at 5.50 a.m instead. It was steep from the start and it wasn't long before I felt it on my thighs. Travelling up the winding path we made it above the clouds, passing people and making good time. Seeing people wearing full walking gear and holding walking sticks I felt under prepared but confident we didn't need the help. We hit the rain and then came the blizzard. As we battled up the ice knowing one slip could end us we made it to the top. The visibility was minimal causing us to almost walk of the cliff edge. This was some scary shit but we made it! We found a woman at the top who took out picture and we headed back down.
Coming down the ice was a disaster yet fun, I fell and smashed my knee. We found ourselves linking arms and almost skiing down the ice stopping just before the sharp black rocks. Due to the rain every step was slippery causing me to fall on my ass. Once we made it to the bottom, the feeling of relief was unbelievable.

So off to Scafell Pike we went cramped in a car eating nothing but sugary sweets to keep our energy levels up. I managed to get an hours sleep. On the way to Scafell we were making good time... Until we got a flat tire! The delay set us back but were still determined.
As we finally arrived we didn't waste any time setting off. Unfortunately I soon felt the pain in my knee and it only got worse as Scafell was steeper than Nevis.
We eventually reached a fork in the path, I opted to go left and my cousin to the right so we asked a few passers by. Two told us it was quicker to go right so that's the way we went. THEY WERE WRONG! We had to free form climb across the rocky landscape and the peak seemed to move further away but once more we persevered.

Reaching the peak, we experienced gale force winds that very nearly blew us away but we still managed to get our picture taken before we headed down. Every step down the pain in my knee became sharper with my cousin also experiencing some discomfort in his hips and foot but we still made it to the bottom in good time.

Next up, Snowdon... We were told it was easy, THEY WERE WRONG! We started at 2 in the morning and it was pitch black. We couldn't see a thing asides from the small spots illuminated by our headlights. We couldn't even see the correct path to take and with my knee causing me agonizing pain, I felt lie giving up but I couldn't so close to the end.
We came across a couple heading to the peak to watch the sunrise and they kindly pointed us in the right direction. We eventually made it to the top and briefly celebrated.

We headed back down, both in pain and annoyed about the time we had wasted being lost in the darkness. Battered, bruised and ready for home, the journey back as the sun came up felt eternal and not once did the end seem near. We eventually made it to the car and didn't have the energy to be enthusiastic, we made it in 24 hours and 50 minutes and after that we just wanted our beds.

I slept all the way home, only waking to the feeling of wanting to be sick until I closed my eyes once more. We made it back and I headed straight to sleep.

As I sit here at Nans, nursing a sore knee, I look back in fondness of our journey, despite the pain and difficulty, it truly was astonishing some of the views we witness. Earth really is beautiful if you look in the right places and I await our next challenge with the same enthusiasm as I did this.

Three's A Crowd (Number One)

So, in a struggle to find a regular posting idea for my blog, I decided to interview a few people, asking them stupid and outlandish questions. It's only an experiment but some of the answers are quite amusing, so enjoy...

1. Do I have the permission to share your name and/or picture? If not, what should we call you?
D: No.... You can call me Dot. I don't know why....
M: You may do
B: Call me Bessie

2. Age?
Dot: 23
Michael: 23
Bessie: 41

3. Occupation?
D: Performing monkey
M: Beasty driver for UPS
B: Manager

4. Have you heard any unimportant news made to seem important?
D: Most of the news is unimportant... same s**t, different day!
M: Yeah, that fucking Miley Cyrus taking drugs
B: All the time

5. Quote of the week?
D: "People don't care what you know until they know how much you care."
M: "Keep it ghetto, make it gangster."
B: "Are you pleased to see me or is that a Mars bar in your pocket??"

6. T.V show of the week?
D: East-enders... it's all going down this week!
M: The Island because it reminds me of our challenges
B: Prey

7. The last brilliant film you watched?
D: Tangled...I'm a big kid
M: Anchorman 2
B: The Family

8. If you ruled the world, what one thing would you change first?
D: A ban against stupid questions like that!
B: stop cruelty to animals

9. What is your favourite sexual position and why?
D: "The Classic" let the guy do all the work while the girl can just lie back and enjoy her-self...
M: Doggy style from an upright position
B: Missionary, I like to look into my lovers eyes.

10. Do you believe there should be a national holiday to celebrate being naked?
D: No...I think I would rather vomit then see some people naked thanks!!
M: Yeah because it’s paid time off work
B: There should be a national holiday to celebrate chocolate!

11.  What was the last book you read that got you excited?
D: Maybe Misery...no joke!
M: Maybe, misery obviously (with a hint of sarcasm)
B: Can't remember.

12. If you had one day left to live, what would you spend it doing?
D: If I knew I was going to die at a certain time, I would spend the rest of the day doing stupid things that could usually result in death ha!!
M: I’d have sex, eat KFC and get to the gym to look pumped, steel a sports car, start a fight, take somebodies life (you’re going to die anyway so it doesn't make a difference). Then I’d rob a shop at gun point, get in a police chase and have more sex.
B: Kissing, cuddling… whilst drinking red wine and eating good food.

13. What's your favourite joke?
D: I don't think I have one, I usually laugh at other people's expense… don't think that can be considered a joke?
M: I don’t have one
B: Men

14. Do you have a special piece of underwear you wear when you know there is a chance they'll be seen?
M: No, anything looks good on me
B: No.

15. And last but not least... Do you believe that religion is a truly awful fairytale, meant to control humanity and inspire false hope?
D: I believe in something... in what way I haven't quite decided yet...most human beings try to control others and inspire false hopes so what's the difference?
M: Yeah it is terrible, but it does give some people the hope that they need
B: Yes.

Red Flash

So here it is whilst I have the chance, the first draft introduction of what I wrote on my Birthday... well some of it anyway. It's all just a work in progress but hopefully you get the idea. I hope you all like it (at least a little bit)...

The deathly halls weep the voices of the ten thousand-fold dead. Covered in a mixture of blood, the dirt of our fight and the shame of defeat I am led down the vast arched marble corridor walk-way which leads to the catalyst.

I know not were we are going, but I know were we have been; through war.

The Constant War fought over what seemed like a millennia, though it had only been a mere fraction of that time. I was born in to it, raised through it and as soon as I came of age; I battled through it until it’s abrupt end. The good, the true believers in doing what’s right, our ancestors built our existence up into the wondrous phenomena it was.
We were the pinnacle of humanity, of the entire universe… We were almost perfect; But as with every side, there is another. The side that craves more, needs more power, more control and there our downfall began.

His name… Drataan, a former minister on the council. Cast out for his extreme views, disgruntled and filled with hatred, he revolted against us all.

This of course, before my time. The stories left by our parents were our only link to the truth. Raised by machines, our childhoods were routine rather than experienced. Our bio-upgrades implanted at birth, our generation were trained for the war.

My memory implants tell me that Drataan, after a long spell in the abyss earned his way back on to the council; only to deceive and betray them all. Drataan had accumulated the powers of the dark during his exile, making him stronger than most. He murdered them all in cold blood, the images of their mangled corpses forever implanted in my brain. Our civilisation soon parted ways with half of them fearing for their lives and joining his cause. The other half fought against his uprising.

For two hundred years the war raged, Drataan’s army grew and we could just not grow enough warriors in time. Our lands reduced to a fiery inferno, we took the war to the skies, below ground and everywhere in between.

We had no chance with Drataan’s power only growing with every life he stole but we never gave up… Not until now.

The cursed Drataan finally got his wretched hands on the last council member, Annai’s father. She stood atop the Verge as she witnessed Drataan absorb the life of her own life-giver. I tried to stop her, but I could not… Annai’s speed was too much for me, she ran at Drataan with such anger, yearning for revenge only to be halted by his hands around her throat.

As he stood all powerful, choking Annai to her inevitable demise, I came out of hiding and stood tall. ‘WE SURRENDER!’ I shouted at the top of my lungs, we have lost so many and our deaths were only a matter of time. I couldn’t bare to lose another, especially Annai.

The year is 2671, we are from the planet 01001110 0110111 01110110 01100001... We call it NOVA.

That birthday weekend.

So it's 2:34 in the morning and it'll soon be time to get ready for work. Thursday and Friday were spent at the gym with Saturday being the day I was longing to avoid. Much to my chagrin it came along anyway. I spent the day sleeping until the early afternoon, don't forget I work all Saturday night before you call me lazy. As soon as I woke, I had this desire to write... but not anything I have already been writing. I found myself wanting to write about super powers and all things fantasy. Almost immediately the idea came rushing to me like a shot of adrenaline. Obviously the super hero genre is somewhat over crowded but I strongly believe in my ability to create something different. Not aimed for teenagers, Not aimed to be a love story and Not aimed to be timid.

So I came up with the idea of ten beings from another planet gifted with biotic implants exiled to another planet (Earth) after a great war. So off I went on a writing mission and I was loving it! It's smarter than my previous writing, more exciting to actually write and guess what? It's more descriptive! It's so much more appealing to me to create something otherworldly. Obviously there's going to be sex and violence in it... that's a given but imagine exploring how biotic's can effect sexual encounters. I don't want it to resemble anything that's come before. When I write, I don't want to write about the hero's, about that predictable love story and I don't want to guarantee a happy ending. I'm tired of fairy tale endings. Someone said to me the other day that if Maybe, misery was a film, they'd go and see it. I responded by telling them if it was made into a film, it would be a high production porno.

Anyway... so Saturday was under way with birthday wishes and what not, I did get a lovely message from an old friend saying he was proud to say he knows me after reading Maybe, misery. I wrote all day and then worked all night. I arrived home at half six Sunday morning and slept like a baby until half one. As soon as my eye's opened I ate some cereal and started writing again. At about half four, I rang Nan to see if she was home from bingo and she was.

I biked it round and she was making me a massive tea since she never saw me on my birthday. It was awesome! I brought my laptop round so I started to write again whilst Nan played on a game she's obviously addicted to until it was time for match of the day.

After match of the day, I biked it home and I've been writing ever since. I've got an hour left before shower time. I'm actually half tempted to share some of it on my blog... we'll see. Anyway I've got this morning and tomorrow afternoon left at work before three peaks. Wednesday my cousin and I are off to collect our Amsterdam tickets, then to the gym. Thursday will be the gym again for more cardio and finally on Friday were off down to Scotland to get ready for those three mountains.

I'll try to update before then but if not... Wish me luck.

  

The compulsion to vent non-existent frustrations.

It's just gone past midnight, I should be going to sleep. I have planned to get up early, have my hair cut and get rid of the beard in time for three peaks and Amsterdam; That's not remotely interesting... but I feel the desire to write something! At midnight! You could of come to me earlier, desire you bastard. What am I supposed to do at this hour!

I don't even need to be writing, I'm supposed to be taking a step back whilst I complete three peaks and sort out Maybe, misery. So what's wrong you ask? Absolutely nothing I answer. Monday morning, I arrived at the bus stop for ten to six. No bus appeared. It must be a bank holiday AGAIN! So I rush home, grab my bike and speed to work. I arrive at work and they inform me a bit too late that I'm off! So I bike it back home... Could of told me sooner! But I get a paid day off and I got some exercise so it's not all bad.

I realised the other day that I'm a funny guy... people laugh at the things I say, whether it's sarcasm, my bluntness or my down right cheek... yet I can't write funny on the page! So why's that a problem you ask? It isn't, I like dark stories and maybe it'll come to me eventually!

I finish work today half an hour late, which is once again unacceptable. I head to Nan's for chicken, brews and a chat. I suddenly get two ideas for books I'd enjoy writing but it keeps dawning on me that every character I've written so far comes across as unlike-able! That's fine, I'm still learning and perhaps once I stop writing characters with my point of view, things will change.

So what's a matter you ask once more? Nothing, I answer.

Confronting fear above ground.

So it's 11 p.m on a Sunday evening. There looks to be no sign of sleeping, I have to be up in 5 hours for work anyway so there's hardly any point trying. I've not long arrived back from Nan's were we played cards, drank tea and I typed some of her book up.

Over this past weekend not much has happened book wise and I doubt it will until June now. Both the first acts are free next Saturday but I probably won't even bother promoting them... Not through laziness but because there's no point now I know what the future holds for Maybe, misery. I can't wait until it's finished, I'm actually excited to see what the finished product will look like. I'm also looking forward to being able to take a step back and see if any of the other writing I've done takes me anywhere.

Friday saw me hit the gym with my cousin. With three peaks less than two weeks away, I feel I'm ready to destroy them mountains and then were off to Amsterdam the week after. My first time out of this country in a decade! I may come back a new man :p

Saturday saw me confronting my fear of heights... sort of. I took part in a tree-top trek, which is an obstacle course about 20 feet in the air. Obviously I was harnessed up but I still feared for my life. It was bloody awful! I'm really not a fan of being up high and feeling insecure! But I managed to get through it thankfully. Probably good that I did considering I'll hopefully be doing a sky dive this year... it's on my list.

So I made my way to work Saturday night and a guy I speak to infrequently comes up to me and asks if I'm still interested in making a film. Too which I reply of course I am! Like I've previously stated it's the logical step after Maybe, misery. he told me that he's found a load of comedy scripts his deceased grandfather wrote and if I'd be interested in having a read. Of course I said yes!

I love film and to make one would be a dream, plus it may be the distraction I need to help with my writing. I feel I need to take a step back from my works in progress but I can't seem to and the result is just more mad-at-the-world characters talking like myself.

Good bye for now world and happy Star wars day!